I met her at my best friend's party. I knew just by looking at her that she was not the type to mess with. Not the type to get serious. Because she's the type to love a person unconditionally.

Definitely not my type.

But the first time I saw her, I felt different somehow. I stood up to shake hands with her.

"Nice to meet you." She said,

I didn't know what I said. I didn't even know if I greeted her properly. I can't remember. I could only remember how her eyes were shining so beautifully that I got so lost in it and I felt my heart skipping a beat. I could only remember how soft her hands were and how they fit perfectly with mine.

I met her again and again because my best friend, Prince, kept pursuing her best friend, Yuvika. I never thought he could love Yuvika like that. He was crazy for her.

I wondered whether I could love a person like that.

I acted so differently towards her that I felt surprised.

When I saw her crying because of her jerk of a boyfriend, I got so mad, I even helped her get revenge. When Prince told me how Yuvika couldn't meet him because it was her birthday, I bought her cakes and flowers even though I didn't need to.

And let me tell you a secret.

That 'fake' date for our best friends to get together again? I never felt that it was fake. I treated it like a real date.

The date was Omi's idea so it was supposed to be him. But I volunteered instead. And don't ask me why. Because I don't know either. I only said, "since we already did a 'fake' date, right?" but if I am honest with myself, I also felt like it wasn't the reason I volunteered.

I saw her trying. After the 'fake' dates, I saw her trying to get close to me. I knew but why do I keep pushing her away?

Why am I so afraid?

I got unreasonably mad at her when she accidentally found out about my past. About my ex, Tanusha, who blamed me for cheating with my colleague. But she was the one who was cheating behind my back with her business partners.

But she was right there. By my side. Gently taking me into her arms while I cried. Whispering soothing words and gently stroking my hair. It was the first time I broke down in front of a girl. My best friends had never even seen me cry.

"I wasn't joking around Teju! Why do you think I'm here? You were gone for a week and looking at your picture was the only thing keeping me sane!"

I saw tears forming in her eyes. Watched as tears ran down her cheeks. And I thought she was still the most beautiful girl I saw.

I stood up and took her in my arms.

"It's true. I do love you. And I'm sorry if I realized it just now." I could feel her arms snake around me and I smiled. I felt complete.

One step closer

The next days, weeks, and months after that were the happiest I've been.

But I was with her one night.

I didn't know how it happened exactly. All I remember is some guys were trying to harass her when I came to pick her up from work. I ran to her and blindly punched the guys. Then it was too late when I realized I was outnumbered. I was down in a minute but I didn't care. All I could think of is Teju. Is she safe? Did she run? She should have. I didn't want her to get hurt.

I could remember the pain in my right hand when one of the guys stepped on it. But it was more painful for me when I didn't know what was happening with Teju and I couldn't do anything about it. I could hear her shouting but I didn't know what she was saying. I blacked out. Teju, I'm sorry if I couldn't protect you that night.

I was in the hospital when I woke up. Teju was sleeping on the chair beside my bed. She was okay. She looked so tired. It was the first time I watched her sleep and it felt great. I suddenly thought that I wanted to wake up every day, every morning watching her chest rise and fall, hearing her soft breath beside my ears and tucking the loose strands of her hair behind her ear.

They told me that Omi happened to be around the area when it happened. He immediately ran to us when he heard her screaming for help. I thanked the heavens for that timing. Or else, I couldn't have lived through it when I found out that she got hurt because I couldn't protect her properly.

I have died every day

waiting for you

Darlin' don't be afraid

I have loved you for a

Thousand years

I'll love you for a

Thousand more

We honestly thought everything was going to be okay after that. That my hand was going to be okay. But we thought wrong. The doctors found out that my hand has been severely injured and that it might not function as it once was.

My hand is everything to my career. How would I play those beautiful instruments? Those masterpieces? I've been playing the guitar ever since I can remember. It's a huge part of my life. What am I going to do?

Tejasswi told me everything would be okay. That she's going to help me.

But I felt that I should be on my own in this journey.

I asked my mentor for advice. What should I do? Where do I go from here? He suggested that I go to him. To train again with him.

My mentor was in the States at the time.

Of course, I didn't want to leave Ladoo. I would never want to leave her.

But I felt like I had to. I needed this, for myself, for my future.

I told her all about the States. Her eyes were shining when I was telling her about it.

"Finally! That's fine Sunny. Go! I've always loved how your fingers glide on the guitar, and how you use it to channel that energy into your music. They express your emotions and your deep thoughts. It's how you express yourself. I honestly think that we can't do anything about your hand anymore. I see some hope now!" Her smile was so genuine. She was happy for me.

"Teju. It's for four years." I dropped the bomb just like that and the reaction was instant. She frowned.

"Wh-what?"

"Four years. States."

"O-oh!" She was stuttering. I know ladoo when she's keeping herself from crying.

There was silence. I could feel the heavy atmosphere. I was waiting for her to speak up. To tell me not to go.

But of course, it's Tejasswi. She puts others first before herself.

"Karan. Go. You need this." She had regained her composure and there was this determination in her eyes.

"Teju —"

"Don't say anything anymore, Karan Kundrra. You need this. If you don't go because of me, if there's someone who could help you and the only hindrance was me... well, you think I'd like that? I love you, Karan. Promise me. Please do this. For yourself. Don't think about me."

"I promise. The first person I'll find when I come back...is you."

I left for the States two weeks after that.

Time stands still

beauty in all she is

I will be brave

I will not let anything

Take away

What's standing in front of me

Every breath,

Every hour has come to this

Tejasswi and I kept in touch for the first year of my time in the States. But the next year came and I've been busy. The phone calls became fewer. I sometimes forget to respond to emails. I received snail mail from her but I never got to open them because whenever I got home, I was too tired to even eat. I didn't even notice when she stopped contacting me.

I worked so hard, day and night because I knew that if I became better earlier than the expected four years, I could go back home. I can go and see her again. Her picture, her smile, was the only thing that kept me going.

Prince, Suyash, and Omi visited me in my third year. They told me what's been happening while I was gone. Prince is the most talkative. He was telling me about Yuvika in her last years of medical school.

That was great and all but I needed to find out about her.

"What about Ladoo ?"

They abruptly stopped talking. Omi cleared his throat while Prince seemed to feel like eating was the most interesting thing to do at the moment. Suyash just stared at the ceiling.

"That's why you're here, isn't it? What's happened to her?" I suddenly became nervous.

"Why haven't you been responding to her?" Omi shoots back.

"I worked all day and all night. I could hardly squeeze in meals. And whenever I did get a break, I spent those times sleeping. I know it's wrong but I thought that maybe if I did read her emails, it might break all my resolve and I'd come home right there and then."

"Karan. She's getting married."

"She's.... she's... What?"

"It wasn't her fault. It was arranged." Omi informed me gently. "She thought it was over between you two when you stopped responding. Since she can't answer her mother straight if she still has a boyfriend, her mother told her to just marry her childhood friend, who's been in love with her since high school, by the way."

"And she agreed?"

"Believe me, Karan. She didn't want to."

"Then, why—?"

"She said she didn't know if you'd respond if she told you that. She didn't know if you still cared. She asked me for help. Tell me the situation. Asked me if I could pretend to be her boyfriend. But her mother saw through it all. So now, her mother talked to the guy's parents. They arranged a wedding. Two weeks from now."

"What?"

One step closer

The three of them stayed in the States for another three days before they went back home. What did I do? I played with the strings of the guitar.

All my emotions came pouring in. The pain I'm feeling at the moment. I expressed it all. I worked all night on the piece of paper. I stayed in my studio for four whole days. The sunlight was brightly peeking through my window when I finished.

"Are you alright?" My mentor asked me as soon as he saw the song and the composition.

I shook my head no. Of course, I wasn't.

"Karan. This is a work of art! It's a masterpiece! I could feel... I could feel love and pain."

I didn't know what to say. I guess the song says it all.

He stared at me. I saw his eyes full of curiosity and concern.

"You can go now. Go home. Go back to India."

"What?"

"Karan Kundrra. With this masterpiece you made, do you think I still have doubts about whether you're doing okay? You're okay. Invite me to your comeback concert."

I have died every day

Waiting for you

Darlin' don't be afraid

I have loved you for a

Thousand years

I'll love you for a

Thousand more

And all along I believed

I would find you

Time has brought

Your heart to me

I have loved you for a

Thousand years

I'll love you for a

Thousand more

Banglore. Of course, I went straight to Bangalore.

I found her sitting by the beach where I first said I love you.

It made my heart skip a beat again like the first time I met her. Like every time I'm with her.

I forgot everything as I walked to her. All I could think about was how much I missed her. How much I miss her smile. Her laugh. Her shining doe eyes.

I was a few feet away from her when I called out her name.

"Tejasswi Prakash!"

She turned around. Her expression changed from surprise to disbelief, to happiness, to sadness, to frustration.

"Remember when I told you, you're the first person I'll find when I come back?"

"So where's your luggage?" Inappropriate questions. One of the things I love about her.

"In the car."

She stared at me. "I'm getting married."

"So I've heard."

"You stopped calling."

"I'm sorry."

"Why did you stop calling?"

"Because I thought I might break my promise."

"What promise?"

"My promise to work hard to get better."

"How—?"

"I might get crazy when I hear your voice. Leave the States when I'm not 'better' yet."

I was caught off guard. Again. When she stood up and hit me.

"You're stupid." She said it like it was the most intelligent thing to say in moments like that.

"I know."

"What should we do now?"

"Well, do you love him?" And when I asked this question, I swear I was nervous as hell.

"What if I answer yes?" My heart was beating so fast when I heard this reply.

"Then, I'll make you love me again until you finally do."

"Then you'll leave me again?"

"No. Then I'll ask you to marry me."

She stopped and stared at me. I waited with bated breath.

"Is that a proposal?"

"Yes." Slowly, I knelt in front of her and pulled the blue velvet box from my pocket. I opened the box, revealing a white gold-pink diamond ring. "Will you please marry me, Tejasswi ?"

I was wrong when I thought that the happiest I'd been was when we first kissed. I was wrong when I thought that the happiest I've been was when I first heard her say, 'I love you.'

This is the happiest I've been.

The happiest I've been was when she said yes.

I didn't believe in forever. But today, as I'm watching her walk to the mandap, I know that Tejasswi Prakash and I...

We will be together forever.

One step closer

One step closer

I have died every day

Waiting for you

Darlin' don't be afraid,

I have loved you for a

Thousand years

I'll love you for a

Thousand more

And all along I believed

I would find you

Time has brought

Your heart to me

I have loved you for a

Thousand years

I'll love you for a

Thousand more